If you truly enjoy your job, it’s probably because you have a sense of humor. Today’s post is dedicated to every employee who ever needed a laugh to get through the day, but especially to those who know what it’s like to do time at the cube farm and need to decorate your cubicle for your mental health.

This post was imported from Suess's Pieces and may contain broken links and missing images

Without further ado, here are the top 6 reasons you need to decorate your cube, like, pronto.

If you don’t decorate your cubicle, one of your prank-pulling co-workers will.

Remember that one time Kate left for a doctor’s appointment, and when she came back someone had pinned photos of a shirtless Mark Paul Gosselaar to her cube walls?

Although personal decorations aren’t 100% effective at preventing such tragedies, their removal adds a level of difficulty, forcing the prankster to re-evaluate whether the stunt is actually worth it.

Decorate, and your boss will automatically assume you’re in it for the long haul.

Simply install a Dilbert calendar, a photo of your cat, and a few paperweights, and then delight in your boss’s false sense of security as he tells his boss, “This one is going to stay. She really likes it here, I can tell.” And, who knows, with your boss a little more relaxed, you might actually want to stay.

You can get sick, come to work, and still feel like you’re resting at home.

So you’re still hourly and you don’t get paid sick leave? No biggie, just buy one of those pretty boxes of Kleenex like you have on your nightstand.

For over-the-top comfort, plug a vaporizer into your power strip and hang up one of those classy, adhesive 3M hooks for that moment your fever breaks and you no longer need the Snuggie.

Your co-workers will have an easier time making assumptions about your personal life.

Married? Single? Gay? Straight? Children? Pets? Christian? Branch Davidian? One framed photo can answer all of these questions and more, giving that guy in accounting the green light to make the off-color joke he’s been holding onto since you started.

Other items that make stereotyping a breeze include Glee screensavers, crosses of any kind, Tribbles, and four or more iPhone accessories located within the same two-foot radius.

You won’t mistake your cubicle for Brad’s cubicle.

At least not again, because—oh em gee—all of these things do look the same. It’s not your fault the only thing differentiating your cubicle from Brad’s is an extra layer of keyboard plaque. You’re new here. What’s Brad’s excuse?

To easily find your place in the maze, go for that one item no one else has—maybe a Doom mouse pad, a snow globe from Door County, Wisconsin, or an autographed photo of Jim Neighbors.

Now tell me what’s in your cube. (Or show me by attaching a photo to your comment).

Pin It on Pinterest