To be in my world, girl, you don’t have to be pigeon perfect. —not Michael W. Smith
The part of me that pretends I live a normal life definitely wanted to update the blog before today, but the part of me that has been sleeping for 12 hours a day has just been like…
Nope. Nuh-uh. Not braining that hard.
While my arms feel much better, my immune system is still working overtime trying to process the information it was given about covid and shingles, which in practical terms means all energy resources have been diverted to making antibodies (that’s how that works, right?) and making sure I can get to the bathroom when necessary.
I am thrilled to report I can still pee on my own, but yesterday I had popcorn for dinner because it was easy. I’d order food, but we’re in the last couple of days before the disability check posts for August, and my checking account is in Low Cash Mode again. (At this point, I don’t know how to operate without worrying about money, so please don’t read anything too dire into this rambling.)
Hopefully once we move and get settled, things will ease up. Financially and otherwise. All the people who’ve ever said “at least you never had kids” because of this asshole never hear me thinking how poor my hypothetical kids would be too.
My trauma footprint will be neutral. And since I don’t drive children to soccer practice, buy them Trapper Keepers or wash their grass-stained clothes, maybe my carbon footprint will be too.
About the move. Nothing too exciting to report, though Mom did send me pictures of her SUV stuffed full of second-hand appliances for the kitchen. I don’t think I’ve mentioned it before now, but we’re going to have a wall oven. Which means maybe I can do a little cooking and baking without falling into the oven a la Sylvia Plath.
Work and inspections continue, and I’m feeling guilty about not having more non-essentials packed. But in my defense, I can’t really determine what’s non-essential in this state.
I am also feeling a little guilty for not pushing the GoFundMe campaign a little more in recent days, but have I mentioned how drained I am? I keep thinking of that meme. I’m not an early bird or a night owl. Just a permanently exhausted pigeon.